Grandpa

We have a new patient (Actually we all know him).

M. said to the Doc: "Male patient, status post...homelessness."
The patient screamed and yelled all the time: "All the doctors wanna sleep with me! Even though I'm not tired!
This whole perverted fornication here.. Every doctor is looking for gay sex! Look it up on the internet!"

When I gave him a pair of socks (because he had none) he became my relational care patient.
He called my "the scholar" all the time and "Miss Tiny". My colleagues made fun of me ;)

Another patient (who claimed to be the son of Prince Charles, the husband of Princess Stephanie from Monacco, the boss of the German Bank, a member of Interpol and some more things..) screamed at me because he simply didn't like females.
"Putain!"
It's been a while since I learned French in school but I do know what that means..
Tiny: "If you think you have to call me names,  you can leave the room immediately and forget your dinner!"
He looked surprised and mumbled: "I said python.."
Tiny: "Just shut up.."

What's better? Being called a whore or a snake?