Doctor: "Oh come on, why is this patient back here again?"
Nurse: "Because he is suicidal."
Doctor: "Oh, I could totally do that for him..."

I picked something up from the floor a few days ago, so my shirt revealed app. a centimeter of my back.
Patient: "Hey, hey, hey! You've got a tattoo!"
Tiny: "No I don't."
Patient: "Of course you have!"

I lauged and said no again.

He said: "What is it?"
I replied: "Your name. Across my whole back."
He: "Really?"
Me: "Sure."
He: "Sweet!" :)

Crazy people are funny.