Patient shouting everytime the monitor of his neighbour gives an alarm:
" YES! Come in!"
"YES! Come in already!"
"It's open, come in!"
" ... (Name of wife), open the door!"
So I entered his room, smiled and said: "Hey Mister X, is everything alright with you?"
And he looked at me, obviously pretty surprised and answered:
XD Geez, in a hospital everyone is fucking nuts after a while, the only difference is the name badge.